The Great Panic

[Ms. Cleo]

And yet he complained that his belly was not full.

"I'm here for the same exact reason the rest've y'all are." I answer to the woman's inquiry about what brought me to the shores of this pristine lake in the Canadian wilderness. "That's what the news kept sayin before they switched to the emergency networks-- 'head north, head north, head north.'"

The faces around the campfire listen attentively as I continue my tale, the shadows of the hot embers reflecting off their flesh in sharp contrast to the moonlit midnight sky.

"Soon as it was confirmed that those f*ckers freeze solid in extreme cold, my whole family -- and I'm talkin' bout my entire extended family here, okay -- we all, or rather all the household patriarchs, decided to head north to Canada for the coming winter, and we'd all meet up at this one mountain...place...thing, I forgot where now. I wanted to stay home, the house was nice and defendable. Raised foundation, a second floor, barred windows that were way above ground level, and a dipped front door that we could just safely block by chucking both the couches over there.

"We lived by a Winchells, an Albertson's, a Super K-Mart, hardware and supply stores, all these fast food chain places and liquor stores and sh*t...plus a mall like, 10 miles away. A half-suburb, it was perfect, y'know? A lotta my friends were heading north, too. All the ones I didn't care about. One of my compadres was packin' up for Mexico with his folks, and my ex was heading for Burbank to meet up with her aunts or something. I still love her, we got off on extenuating circumstances.

"We were best friends before hookin' up, real close like siblings, all that bullshit. I was good friends with her little sister, too. That's how I kept track of 'em and stuff. Well, up until we went our separate ways and the cell signals were taken up by the emergency networks once martial law went into effect. I'm actually plannin' on headin' Burbank first thaw. My homey from Watts moved to North Carolina the month before, my neighbors just disappeared, my high school clique...I didn't really talk to 'em at all once break started.

"But I lost contact with the ones I gave a sh*t about, and I always valued my friends more than my broken little family. My dad never agreed with the hair and piercings and shit, my mom was a saint but was just an idiot, y'know? She meant well but she would always make the worst decisions ever. They kept arguing the whole trip. My sister...I have no idea what ever happened to her, she never came home. Well, we packed up enough food for weeks, filled up on extra containers of gasoline, got in the van with "essential" supplies, like my mom's make-up kits and my dad's sports trophies...and headed north. I noticed a lot of people doing the same, bringing their DVDs and televisions, instruments and expensive decor, all that stuff. I always assumed they were afraid of coming home after everything was over to find their house ransacked by looters. Still...

"Well anyways, the dead were already starting to show up as we pulled outta town. Real slow-like, though. One street, the kids would be playing with their toys and the ignorant would be casually walking to the store for groceries wondering why the hell everybody was in such a hurry, then four blocks down towards the bridge outta town a few of those dirtbags were roaming around empty sidewalks looking for a meal. The last thing I saw before getting onto the 710 was a 'lil group of 'em feedin' on that one bum that asked me for change every time I went to the store.

"I kept telling my folks that this was a bad idea. I even called out my dad on it, I straight-up asked him what the f*ck we were gonna do once we got to Canada? Everyone was prepared for the trip but few actually thought ahead on to what they would do beyond that once we got there. I guess they figured like my pig-headed father that once we got there, we would just have to wait for the f*ckin' army to show up and save our asses. Pshh...Hurricane Katrina...

"He had a point that even though we could fortify our house against the undead, we'd still be vulnerable to the lunatics and looters, and throngs of stranded survivors desperate for any shelter whatsoever. I still had a retort, though. At least in our house we'd be on familiar grounds with our own terms. Out on the open road, once the gas stations run dry, our working car with all the crates of food and shim-shimmy packed in the back seat and strapped to the roof of the car would look reaaaaal tempting. With all those zombies and nutjobs on the loose, we wouldn't know what to expect out there...and lemme tell ya, I really hate being right sometimes.

"We went to stop for a bathroom break...I remember it so vividly, y'know? There were trees all over and the foliage was so dense. You couldn't see anything...we didn't see the mob that surrounded my dad as he was doing number 2 a few yards from the road behind the bush."

"As soon as I heard his screams..." My eyes begin to puff up and my voice slightly breaks; I try like hell to stay strong, but I don't know if the others noticed or not, "...As soon as I heard his screams, my mom panicked in the car and started hyperventilating. She had high blood pressure and hypertension...I popped the trunk and threw out a couple of boxes to get to my dad's 12-gauge. I don't know why the hell it was buried under so much crap. Seems like in a zombie apocalypse, a shotgun would be one of the things you'd wanna keep handy, know what I mean?

"It was probably my mom's idea. She was always worried about the police or drawing too much attention like that. I got there too late and he already got bitten twice on his arm and shoulder while trying to get away...*sigh*. I cursed out the mob as I blew their brains out and then picked up my dad, put him in my seat, got behind the wheel and sped off as his groans of agony were drowned out by my mom's wails of grief.

"I told my mom what was gonna happen to him. I felt so bad, but she knew. Dad knew, too. I already knew cause I was such a huge fan of zombies in the movies and video games before all this, and my folks saw the reports on TV so they knew what to expect. Ha, to think that I always used to wish for a zombie apocalypse to happen to save me from the mundane boredom and tedious monotony that was my life as a single college student who had no idea what to do with his life. Uagck...he was holding mom's hand so tight with tears in his eyes. I never saw dad cry before, never...not even when my grandmother passed away. I never would have guessed it but they really did love each other. I always thought the loved faded away years ago when my mom put on 60 pounds and my dad had the stint with his secretary, but they were genuinely crushed to know that they would soon be separated.

"We tried to stop the bleeding as best we could, cleaning the wounds with water from the boxes and wrapping 'em with clean clothing. We managed to keep him from turning for another day. But the infection was just too severe, and he reanimated in his sleep the next night. We would have died in our sleep too if it wasn't for the other family that saved us with their hunting rifle.

"After a burial and some prayers, we joined up with this other family, real nice people, Jewish and open-minded. Two young sons and an adopted black teenaged daughter my age.

"She was a lesbian, though, and I was never into the black ones," I say in a half-joking manner with a smile. "We made it to the border and thats where we lost all our stuff at a rest stop when a motorcycle gang mugged everybody and shot my mother...

"I...well yeah. I..." I begin to break up again and just stop myself to save face. "Anyways, here I am. Broke as a joke with no hope. Except with this baby."

I pull out a Glock-looking pistol I looted off a police officer's corpse.

[Kan]

The flicking of the fire shows an indifferent look on my face as I listen to the other teen finish his story and show off his Glock pistol. The others look to me, as it seemed I was the next in line to tell a story. I glare at their faces with a blank look on my face.

"No thanks, telling stories isn't going to help us any now, and their isn't any point, thing is Everyone I knew is dead and I watched almost all of them die, but the only thing that matters is that I survived" I say in a apathetic tone before standing up, the orange fire flickering light splashing against my clothes. I grab the MP5 that had been laying at my side and walk away towards the end of the supposed perimeter to start my watch shift.

I had ended up with this group after I had been traveling by myself for god knows how long, I had gotten used to relying only on myself, and I haven't been doing well interacting with other living human beings, especially in the trust area, I always kept my loaded weapon with me, even as I slept, just in case.

I grip the grip of the weapon as I walk along the safe zone, watching out for any zombies that might have made it this far. It was cold, but I didn't feel it was cold enough to freeze those bast*rds yet.

OOC: Hope this is alright Cleon.

[Ms. Cleo]

OOC: Holy crap, Kan can write!

"Dude, you shouldn't be so uptight." I say to the kid with the submachine gun as I casually walk out behind him while lighting a cigarette, somewhat surprising him due to the randomness of my approach. "In my experience, that's what leads to a whole lotta distrust in situations like this. I mean hell, look at movies like Night of the Living Dead where they took more flak from each other than they did from the Gs.

"And by the way, you forgot a lil somethin' back there?" I say after an exhale of cold tobacco smoke, twice as thick from the freezing mountain air while raising up the walkie all the sentries are supposed to bring with them to use in case of a contact and shake it teasingly.

[Oct-taku]

"It might not help." the teen sitting across the fire said. "Telling stories, that is. But really, it's one of the few things that I...that we have left." He shifted the silenced .22 handgun from his left hand to his right, then shot a glance towards a young woman, around his age, a few yards away.

"Name's David, David Reed. Nineteen years old, born in Pentsworth, Illinois." he continued, his voice wavering somewhat. "My family decided what about every other idiotic group of Americans decided to do: go north to Canada. Me, my parents, my two sisters, and my girlfriend Anna over there." he waved, this time, to the young woman.

"My dad was a former engineer-turned-stay-at-home-programmer, and my mom taught 2nd grade at the local elementary school. The outbreak had already spread to Pentsworth by the time we left. It didn't affect my family much. Either the local police would put down any G's they saw, or my dad would, if they got too close to our house. He was pretty handy with a .30-06. When we left, over half the town had been killed or infected, including Anna's family.

"I never got along very well with the rest of my folk. My dad was like a drill sergeant. He told you to crap, you asked where, how big, and what color. My mom was practically the same way, except more depressed. Constantly convinced that no one loved her, when it was that attitude that forced us away from her emotionally. My younger sister was a b*tch, and my even younger one was a whiney brat. The exodus up here to Canada in our SUV was like one giant, hateful road trip.

"I'll give my family this: they were smart. We moved during the day, parked during the night. One person awake and alert at all times. No one going anywhere without at least one other person and a gun. We had plenty of those.

"It...it came to a head just outside of Byers, Wisconsin. My mother had been worried about our food supplies. We'd packed up as much as possible, but between the six of us, and the occasional hiker that my family and their bleeding hearts gave a quick lift to, it was running pretty low. So, my mom reccommended that we leave Anna behind. She wasn't 'a member of this family.' The flight north had turned my family's usual kindness to bitter, terrified paranoia and stone-heartedness.

"After she said that, the next thing I remember was my dad pulling me off of her. I had repeatedly pistol-whipped her face with my Colt, and it had knocked her unconcious for a few minutes. They talked for a bit, then told me that next morning, Anna and I had better be gone. Heck of a disownment, huh?

"That never happened. That night, we were staying in an abandoned gas station. While we slept, a few ghouls managed to get in, and more followed. We awoke the the bark of my dad's rifle. I grabbed Anna by the wrist, led her out the back entrance, told her to wait by the SUV. I went back inside, tried to help my family out, you know?

"After a few minutes, it was obvious what had happened to Byers. Entire town had reanimated, and was converging on that gas station. I'm helping my family hold the place down, and then I hear Anna screaming. Outside one of the station windows, a few Zeds had surrounded her, cornered her against the SUV. At the same time, the dead were pouring into the gas station, and there was no way they could hold it without my help.

"I don't think I need to say which I chose. I left my family, my entire family, to be eaten alive, or worse. All for her sake. And I don't regret it. I can't. Stories might not be able to help, but they're one of the few things that we...that I have left. But the only thing that matters to me, is her."

[Ms. Cleo]

OOC: What the...f*ckkkkk...

"Wow." Is all I could say as I return to my seat on the campfire, coming in around the middle of David's tale. "That's...like...that's either the most touching story I've ever heard or the vilest tale of abandonment of kin I've come to hear.

"I dunno whether I should be glad for your relationship or just tempest in disgust..."

I then simply shrug and light up another cigarette while thinking about making some coffee from the instant powders I've been hiding from everybody.

[Oct-taku]

"Looks like we're of the same mind, then." David said. "I can't really tell which I secured: salvation, or damnation."

[Ms. Cleo]

"'Ey, it all depends on how you look at it." I retort in a philosophical manner. "On the one hand, you left your..."

I then suddenly let out a belch before I can finish my extremely creative and abstract thought.

"You know what, I'm too tired. My whole life I've been the one guy everyone knew as the nice guy, and the abstract thinker, and turned to me for advice cause of my past experience. Now, pretty much like, all my friends could be walkin' corpses with a taste for human flesh for all I know. Even though this whole rationale has gotten me thus far, I've always been the one for change. Maybe this whole zombie sh*t's a sign to head in a new direction.

"Besides, I'm too f*ckin' tired to think of somethin' smart." I finish before puffing the Marlboro Menthol Light 100.

...

"You know, that's in itself a kind of abstract theory..."

I look at the woman sitting across from me with a raised eyebrow before the dog lying next to us lets out a huge fart.

[Oct-taku]

David burst out laughing.

"It's been so long sinced I've laughed, you know?" he said, after is subsided. "And I know what you mean. Full scholarship to any college I wanted in Illinois, 4.0 GPA. How does help me now? Not much. Not much.

"Thank God for first-person shooters and a gun-nut dad."

[Ms. Cleo]

"Hahaha, too true, man." I agree while still snickering and looking at the dog, just laying there shifting his gaze from person to person in a lazy, nonchalant manner as if it didn't just just let out the loudest fart of the forest winter. "I think I learned most of my firearms trivia and shooting tips from Rainbow Six Vegas for the 360."

I discard the cigarette butt by throwing it into the fire and then warm my hands over the flames.

"It's really gettin' cold now, ain't it? There's no snow yet, but you think some of the zeds are stratin' to freeze? We haven't seen one since yesterday morning."

[Kan]

I had taken the radio without a word, clipping it to my belt. Now I am sitting on an old stump. I take a quick look around before digging into my pocket and grabbing an old gum case, 5 (flare) it had on it. I take out a stick, unwrap it and stick it into my mouth and chew.

It was a habit but at least it was nicotine, getting dependent on something like that now would be a bad idea.

Sitting there I begin to remember, it was true it didn't do any good but every now and again I can't stop from remembering.

I had been living a normal life, surfed the net and all that junk, and lived in the Southeast. While I was honest when I said I saw everyone die, I didn't see it directly but I might as well had.

It had happened so fast, the only thing that saved me and my first group was my knowledge, we made it to the nearby military base, which happened to be the largest Ammo Depot in America, we all figured it would be a good place to go.

We made it there just as a mutiny was finishing, the soldiers rebelled against their commanding officer, who was not allowing the men to aid survivors, however the mutiny had not gone very well, with zombies getting in. We only had enough time to,'borrow' some equipment as the base was being overrun. The resulting firefight took out half out numbers. As we were escaping a radio broadcast from the nearby nuclear plant was played over the base com as well as meltdown sirens could be heard.

We barely made it out of the blast radius when the plant exploded, thankfully not much radiation was released thanks to the heroic efforts of unknown peoples. The blast destroyed the town and killed and rekilled everything in it.

I blow a small bubble as I finish my memory and sigh as I grip my SMG, which I had had with me since the military base, with a few add ons.

[Ms. Cleo]

"We should prolly start thinkin' about going out to gather supplies, right?" I suggest to some others while poking at the smaller wood cuts on the edge of the bonfire with a stick out of boredom. "Frozen zeds or not, we're all runnin' low on amenities and medicine."

I exhale into the cold air, my breath showing due to the low temperature.

"And as we get deeper into winter, we're gon' need more blankets and clothing and stuff, you know?"

I remember what I read from that zombie survival book from way before this all became a reality. Last thing we'd need is to start running low on supplies and begin tearing each other apart to survive.

[Oct-taku]

David nodded.

"Right. Thankfully, I grabbed a book on herbal remedies on the way up here, but...well, that'll have to wait until spring, right?" he said with a chuckle.

[Ms. Cleo]

I chuckle in the guttural triad that I used to be known for while still poking at the fire.

"I wouldn't mind riskin' my ass to go out there and do some lootin', as criminal as that sounds. To tell ya the truth, I always dreamed of goin' on some crazy lootin' spree in the midst of a post apocalyptic world. Even though everyone's still pretty much alive and kickin', this may as well be as close as we get to makin' that a reality."

[Kan]

I stare out into the darkness, every now and again shining my gun's light into the woods and listening. It had been a few night since more that a few zombies wandered close to us, but still can't get to comfy, that happened once before, and I aim to make sure I don't get like that again.

I traveled with my original group for a long time, we all got over confident, we let things slip, small things at first, until one of us made a fatal mistake, that night almost everyone was killed, not by zombies, but bandits. Oh we fought, and a choice few made it out alive, but we were separated.

[Ms. Cleo]

"Hey, where's that one kid?" I publically inquire about the one guy who chose his girl over his family. "He better not be knee deep in a zombie orgy or whatever."

I get up to look for the kid who had been gone for the past half hour now.